Sunday was April Fools Day. One of my church music friends sent me this for amusement only:
Organist/Choir Director/Church Secretary/Bell Director/Sexton COMBO, Memorial
of the Memorial Church, 666 Insanity Lane, Styx, VA 22207 Church membership:
7,200 families. Ann. salary: $125,000 plus benefits, use of church Lexus, and housing
stipend of $10,000 per month. Play nine Sunday Services, three daily services, weddings
and funerals. Rehearse and accompany eight vocal and bell choirs. Organize, direct,
and publicize six-eight special music programs each year. Must be comfortable
with classical, traditional, contemporary, Gospel, Christian Rock, Taize, Jazz, Dixieland,
and high Anglican worship styles, with excellent sight-reading, improvisation,
organ, piano, janitorial, bulletin folding, and lawn mowing skills. Open score reading,
lead-sheet reading, and chair moving skills is a plus. One Sunday and two weekdays
of paid vacation annually. Under the ultra critical watchful eye of the Senior Pastor.
Please call Ricky Wrinkle at 703-555-1 OMG (church).
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